Who Do You Hang Out With? How Do You Spend Your Time?

It's hard to make changes in life. Whether you've decided to improve a relationship, change a career, or do something you've always wanted to do, you're up against many challenges. Committing to a new path involves breaking old habits, learning new ways of doing things, and having the tenacity and will to keep on trying, even when the change you want isn't happening as fast as you would like.

If you're finding yourself getting frustrated or discouraged about a change you've been working towards, ask yourself two crucial questions:

 1.      Who am I hanging out with?

2.       How do I choose to spend my time?

 You probably need to make some conscious changes in these two areas.

WHO AM I HANGING OUT WITH?

It's difficult to change a habit or go for something new if you have people around you who would prefer you to keep to the status quo, or don't understand the new direction you're taking.

You need to be able to feel and envision the new way your life is going to be. The more you can be in the energy, talk, and actuality of the new way of being, the easier it will be for you to remain excited about your intention and believe that it can happen. Therefore you want to make sure that the people you're spending time with can be a part of the new life energy.

If you're a lawyer, for example, but have decided that you want to find more time to seriously pursue your unused talent in the arts, don't expect yourself to be in "legal world" all day, and then miraculously be painting like a genius when you get home.

You'll want to start building in some time with like-minded people. Find others who are also interested or active in the arts.  Go to exhibits, join an arts group, or make new friends that are enthused about using their creative abilities too.

*** 

Perhaps it's an internal, spiritual change you're making. You'll stay on your path more easily if you spend time with others who make their spiritual or personal development a priority.  If the greater part of your day is filled with people who are interested in other things, you'll tend to be distracted by those other things too.

You don't have to drastically drop everyone you're associating with. Nor do you have to label those who don't share your goals as "bad"!  But do start having a greater awareness of who you're spending time with, and their ability to support you and your intention.

Do your friends take seriously your new goal, what you're trying to create, and who you're trying to be? Do you feel positive feelings from them when you talk about it? After being with others, has your energy increased, or do you feel drained?

 ***

It's not the responsibility of others to make changes for you. But you do need energetic, verbal, and tangible action support from the people around you as much as possible in this transition time.

If you feel that you're an alien among strangers, don't give up. It's time to go out and find new like-minded aliens. You deserve "your people."

 

HOW DO I CHOOSE TO SPEND MY TIME?

I focused on the need for supportive people first because I believe they're the greatest influence on your ability to make life changes. But even if you have as much support as humanly possible, you can't expect to magically make the change you want. You, yourself, must take tangible action.

Changing life habits  requires new input, either through learning about the new area you're entering, taking action steps towards creating the new reality, or providing the energetic and visual environment that will nurture and support that which you want to happen. And all of those things take time. How do you spend yours?

Think of the change you've started or are yearning to make. Have you changed your lifestyle to do it? You'll need to.

 ***

Suppose, for example, that you've decided you want to write more. You tell yourself you're going to do it every night after dinner. And each night after eating you continue to turn on the TV, telling yourself that you'll get to it after this show, when you've had more rest, or after your work slows down.

You probably already have every hour of your day informally committed to something. So something's going to have to change in order to create the space for your new lifestyle.

Stop and take a look at how you've been spending your time recently. There are always choice points, times in the day when you can choose to do what you always do or start doing the new thing that leads to what you want, and will really change your life.  Look at your habits, ways in which you spend time without even thinking about it. Did you really need to spend that half hour surfing the Internet? Or could you have used that time to sit down and meditate like you've been meaning to?

*** 

Recognizing that you're at a choice point doesn't always mean that you know exactly what to do. If you don't have a plan, just congratulate yourself on seeing that you need help in changing your pattern. And then go get that help! 

Seek counseling/coaching, get more information, or find other avenues of support. And then keep on recognizing the choice points, and deliberately changing your old pattern. Gradually, you'll start changing how you fill that time so it's in alignment with how you truly want to live.

*** 

Each week, day, week, or moment continually offers you choice points, times where you either can start to live in your new way of being, or put off that change for later. Which will you do?

Consciously choose to create your life. Don't expect it to miraculously change if you hang out in old consciousness, make no space for the new, and continue to live the way you've always lived.

 Ask yourself daily:

     *        Who am I hanging out with?

    *         How do I spend my time?

 
And bravely do what is necessary to make room for change.

Explore posts in the same categories: Inspiration

192 Comments on “Who Do You Hang Out With? How Do You Spend Your Time?”

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    ñýíêñ çà èíôó!!…

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  176. freddie Says:

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  178. Jerome Says:

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  180. Oscar Says:

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  182. Francisco Says:

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